TYGER'S DIARY SEPTEMBER 30, 1999

SEPTEMBER 30, 1999
CAT COMMANDMENTS
sent in by WolfgangVon Schnauzer from The Pet Vine
Thou shall not jump onto the keyboard when thy human is on the modem.
Thou shall not pull the phone cord out of the back of the modem.
Thou shall not unroll all of the toilet paper off the roll.
Thou shall not sit in front of the television or monitor as thou are not transparent.
Thou shall not projectile vomit from the top of the refrigerator.
Thou shall not walk in on a dinner party and commence licking thy butt.
Thou shall not lie down with thy butt in thy human's face.
Fast as thou are, thou cannot run through closed doors.
Thou shall not reset thy human's alarm clock by walking on it.
Thou shall not climb on the garbage can with the hinged lid, as thee will fall in and trap thyself.
Thou shall not jump onto the toilet seat just as thy human is sitting down.
Thou shall not jump onto thy sleeping human's bladder at 4 a.m.
Thou shall realize that the house is not a prison from which to escape at any opportunity.
Thou shall not trip thy humans even if they are walking too slow.
Thou shall not push open the bathroom door when there are guests in thy house.
Thou shall remember that thou are a carnivore and that house plants are not meat.
Thou shall show remorse when being scolded.
Thanks to Wolfgang for these funny cat commandments. I hope everyone enjoyed them and got some laughs out of them. I laughed like crazy the first time I read them. So I thought it would be fun to share them with all of you here. Due to spreading myself too thin with my real life and my various online projects, I'm only able to update this page once a week now. I hope this is not an inconvenience to my readers. If so, I'm sorry. See you next time!
Your Friend, TygerStar079